How To Get Beat By A Bully Offer

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10 minute read

April 19, 2023

It’s currently 8:45am.

I just got to my desk.

I haven’t even cracked the lid on my Tim Horton’s coffee yet, which is really saying something, especially to those who know me.

The thing about writing three blogs per week, going on seventeen years, is that when you have an idea for a post, you’ve got to sit down and write it.

I swear, I could be driving on highway-401, think up an idea, and I’ll pull over to the side of the road and send myself an email.  I suppose there’s a downside to that, in that I’m losing my short-term memory, and I receive a half-dozen emails from myself every day, but that’s another story…

Last night, clients of mine lost out to a bully offer submitted on a house that they loved.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but it’s a blog-worthy story.  And not just worthy but rather necessary.

Earlier this month, I wrote:

“Beating The Bully At Their Own Game”

It was a blog about buyer-clients of mine who were interested in a house, only to see a bully offer submitted on the property, but ended with them beating out the bully offer and buying the home.

The other side to this story is the one I’m going to tell today.

The other side to this story is the process of losing to a bully as well as the emotional rollercoaster therein.

Georgia & Zach have been looking to upgrade from a small(er) condo townhouse to a larger 3-bedroom, 2-bathroom freehold for over a year now.

Like many would-be buyers, they have used the phrase, “We’re in no rush” on many occasions, and these folks really mean it.  They love where they live.  They have enough space.  They don’t have kids, they don’t work from home, and they don’t need to move.

But do they expect to be in the condo townhouse for another five or ten years?  No.

Could they use more space?  Yes.

Can they afford to buy up?  Absolutely.

So unlike many buyers who have a real impetus for a move, such as being pregnant with twins and living in a one-bedroom condo, or wanting to get out of the rental market and into the housing market, Georgia and Zach don’t need to move.

They actually reached out to me in 2021 asking for some ideas on how to update their townhouse for “down the line” when they looked to sell, so they were way ahead of the game.

Then in 2022, after the market had peaked and had started to slow down, they reached out again and said they wanted to start looking.

The irony is: the first house we looked at was well after the market had declined, but of course, it received twelve offers and sold for an absurd price!

“This shouldn’t be happening now,” I told them.  “That’s a February price and it’s July.  This isn’t the right spot for you guys.”

We looked at a few houses last year but the timing was never right as they were looking to solidify new jobs, were busy with family dynamics, and had been traveling.

When the page turned to 2023, there was a renewed interest in the housing search and this time it came with some authority.

Some buyers move quickly.  Others plan ahead.  There really is no right or wrong way of doing it.

Last month, I met a couple for the very first time who said they wanted to upgrade from their existing home, and within eight days, they had purchased a new house.  Right time, right place, right house, and they’ll admit they never would have seen this coming!

But on the flip-side, you have couples like Georgia & Zach who plan way, way ahead, and who after renovating their townhouse, upgrading their salaries, and getting their financial ducks in a row, are now ready to jump into the housing market.

Two weeks ago, we saw a house that looked pretty good.  On paper and on MLS, it was perfect.  In person, it was probably a B+.

We left the viewing talking about price and strategy, but after Georgia & Zach went back to the open house, they followed up and said, “This isn’t the one for us.”

Then yesterday (as I tell the story, sitting here this morning, but ya’ll might be reading this days or weeks later…), a listing came out in their target area and they were instantly enamored.

It was a Wednesday, and the listing was strategically under-priced with an offer date set for the following Tuesday.

“Can we see it tomorrow night?” Georgia asked.

I confirmed that we could and that I was available, and she said she would talk to Zach and get back to me.

The listing came out around 11:30am, by the way.  We were having this conversation mid-day.

Georgia followed up and said, “Actually, Zach isn’t available tomorrow night so could we see it tonight?”

I told her that I was on another appointment but that Matthew from my team could take them through and so we set up the appointment for 7:00pm.

Georgia followed up again and said, “Actually, can we meet at 8:30pm?  Zach is coming from downtown and he’s going to be late!”

So we set the appointment up for 8:30pm!

As is often the case in our market where we’re used to “whatever can go wrong, will,” I received a note from the listing agent around 6:00pm that said, “I might be getting a bully offer on the property, just wanted to let you know.”

Of course.

Although, if I choose to look on the bright side, at least Georgia and Zach decided to see the house tonight instead of tomorrow, as originally planned, so at least they can get in and make a decision without the decision being made for them.

At 7:30pm, the listing agent emailed me to say that they did receive a bully offer and that it was irrevocable at 10:00pm.

I see.

Irrevocable at 10:00pm?  Or “irrevocable at 10:00pm, wink, wink,” as in you have until 11:59pm but you want agents to get their shit together on time?

I called the listing agent and she said, “No, it’s actually irrevocable at 10:00pm.  Do you think your clients are gonna do anything?  It’s tight!”

“They could,” I told her.  “And you and I have been here before,” I added.

She laughed.

About five or six years ago, she was reviewing offers on an east-end listing at 7:00pm and I booked a showing for 6:00pm.  She called me and said, “I have six offers on this property, you know.  Presenting at 7:00pm.”  I told her that I was aware, and that my clients would make a quick decision.  They did.  And we bought the house that night.

I’ve also brought her two successful bully offers as well, so she and I have a good working relationship.

“I’ll let you know as soon as I can,” I told her.  “Don’t send that accepted offer until 9:59pm, okay?”

“Only for you,” she said with a laugh.

One of my clients ran late, of course, so that didn’t help matters, but they were both inside the house with Matthew by 8:45pm.

I had already drafted an offer with all the negotiable points (price, deposit, closing, title search, inclusions/exclusions, clauses) determined as I saw fit, and I had uploaded it to DocuSign and marked it with signatures and initials.  If we needed to change anything in the offer, such as the price, I could make the change and re-upload to DocuSign in under one minute.

Matthew called me at 9:10pm.

“This is a go,” he said.  “This house is perfect.  And honestly, it’s so undervalued.  This is a solid play for them.”

He told me they would call me by 9:30pm at the latest, which would have left us twenty-nine minutes.

They called at 9:20pm, as luck would have it.  That left thirty-nine minutes.

An absolute eternity in real estate time, but the clients didn’t see it that way.

“David, this is insane,” Georgia said.  “We love the house but we hate this process.”

I may be desensitized to how our buy/sell process works in Toronto but I’m certainly not unsympathetic.  I know that in a situation like this, you need to compartmentalize and start from the beginning.

“The listing agent is going to wait until 9:59pm to send the accepted bully offer to the agent that sent it,” I told them.  “That’s the first thing you need to know and that means we have almost forty minutes to work this through.”

“Forty minutes?” Georgia said.  “Who buys a house like this?”

“Lots of people,” I told her.  “It doesn’t make it any less stressful for you guys right now, and I don’t expect your emotions to change knowing this, but the situation you’re in right now is very common.”

“We really like the house,” Zach said.  “This just sucks.”

I added, “I know it sucks but we can’t change it.  Let’s talk it through.”

I explained to them that they could buy this house tonight if they wanted to.  I had discussed numbers with the listing agent and I knew where we needed to be on price.  She was fine to sell to us without a deposit cheque in hand, based on my reputation and our working relationship.  And the sellers wanted a longer closing which was great for Georgia and Zach, since we needed to sell their condo townhouse.

“This is just such an awful way to buy a house,” Georgia said.  “I hate this pressure.”

“Then don’t do it,” I told her.  “You need to be ‘all in’ on this, right here, right now.  This has to be a no-brainer,” I told her.

“That’s not really us,” she said.  “We will never be those people that say, ‘let’s do it.’  We like to agonize over things!”

She was being a bit facetious but also noted that they’re not decisive people.  They’re analytical.  They like to stew.  And who could blame anybody for feeling that way when considering a purchase of this magnitude?

Georgia said, “We need to call my Mom, we’ll get back to you in five minutes.”

This was now 9:26pm.  We had thirty-three minutes.

I’ve been doing this long enough to know that five minutes in a situation ripe with anxiety and trepidation is going to be at least ten minutes.

By 9:39pm, however, the listing agent was texting me for an update.

“It’s not 9:59pm yet,” I texted her, adding a smiley face.

She had a vested interest in waiting for me since the price I gave her was clearly higher than what she had, so it was no loss to her except for time.

Zach and Georgia called me at 9:40pm.

“I think we’re out,” they said.

I told them, “No problem, I’m glad you thought it through.”

Georgia said, “What price do you think we could get this for?” and I realized that they weren’t really out just yet.

We discussed pricing and Georgia and Zach agonized.  I could hear her whisper, “Let’s just fucking do it” to Zach, and then silence.

Zach said, “We need to call my brother.  We need two minutes.”

Do you believe it was two minutes?

Nope.

The next twelve minutes went by very, very slowly.

I had my finger on the “Send” button in DocuSign, ready to fire off the offer for them to virtually sign, while sitting in their car, without reading.

Without reading.

So many of you are cringing reading this right now, and I don’t blame you at all.

I’m not cavalier.  And I’m not a bum either.

I would never do something like this if it weren’t in the best interest of the client.  I’ve submitted thousands of offers before.  It’s just virtual paper to me, and 99% of the offer is boiler-plate.  All that really matters in a case like this is the price.

The more that time ticked by, the more I came to the conclusion that we weren’t going to make this offer.

In fact, I kind of hoped they would say, “We’re out for real,” since I knew that making a decision with two minutes to go just isn’t a feel-good method of attempting to buy a home.

Have I done this before?  Yes.

More than a few times?  Absolutely

But it never feels good for the buyer.  They feel good eventually, but when?  Fifteen minutes later when I tell them they got the property?  Three hours later when they go to bed?  The next morning when they wake up?

I’ve been a buyer in this market myself many times.  The last two properties I bought, as primary residences, were in competition.  I’ve walked the path.

I texted the listing agent and said, “I hope you have that offer already signed by your seller, loaded in an email to the buyer agent, with your finger on the ‘send’ button.”

“Way ahead of you,” she texted back.

It was so courteous of her to wait for me.  Some agents wouldn’t bother trying to get their clients more money; they would have just sold the property two hours ago.

At 9:57pm, Georgia and Zach called back.

“Okaaaaay,” she said.  “I think……I think…..”

“You’re out,” I finished for her.

She sighed.

“Yeah, we’re out,” she said.

“Guys, this is a good decision.  You’re not all-in on this.”

Zach said, “We just can’t do it.  We can’t buy a house from our car.  We’re sweating buckets, both of us.  Fidgeting, freaking.  This just sucks.”

“You made the right call,” I told them.  And it’s true.  Every buyer is different and maybe another buyer in this situation would have pulled the trigger, but it’s really, really tough.

I texted the other agent and said, “They’re out.  But thank you, thank you, thank you for waiting for me.”

She said, “Okay, fair.  And no worries.  Have a great night!”

Georgia continued to talk her way through it and make arguments for doing it, but I kept my eye on the clock and once it hit 10:01pm, I said, “It’s okay guys, the other offer is accepted.  So you’re off the hook.”

They were so relieved.

Honestly, this was a great house for them.  Had this gone to offer night next week and we’d had time to see it again for a second time, go through the motions of the offer day and offer process, and avoid the insanity of trying to compete against a bully offer and the running clock, I think they would have bought it and been really happy.

But there are many ways to get to the finish line in this industry and some buyers just can’t run that particular race.

Who could really blame them?

And I told them as much.

“If you told your parents you saw a house for a half-hour then submitted an offer from your car, they would go nuts.”

They laughed.  They had to laugh at that.

“If you bought this house tonight then told the person at the cubicle next to you at work tomorrow, ‘We signed an offer we didn’t even read,’ your colleague would think you’re crazy.”

But that’s the market we’re in and that’s the process sometimes.

Whenever I listen to podcasts or read books by these mega-agents in the United States, I always think, “You guys have no clue what it’s like up here.”

When I watch these HGTV shows (I mean my wife watches them while I begrudgingly work in the background…) and they feature a couple viewing three homes then ‘picking’ one, negotiating a price below list, and having the seller pay their closing costs and remedy and repair every deficiency in the inspection, I think, “This is like Earth versus Mars.”

My clients got beat by a bully offer.  A more prepared, more aggressive buyer beat my clients to the punch, and that’s okay.

If you never thought you’d hear me say, “You can’t win ’em all,” then maybe you haven’t been reading this blog long enough.

If you’re not losing, you’re not playing.

That’s an adage in our business.  Losing is part of the process.  When there are twenty offers on a property, there are nineteen losers.  When a bully offer is submitted on a house, there are going to be other losers as well.

Perhaps I tell more stories about winning than losing, but last night, we lived and breathe the story of “how to get beat by a bully offer…”

Written By David Fleming

David Fleming is the author of Toronto Realty Blog, founded in 2007. He combined his passion for writing and real estate to create a space for honest information and two-way communication in a complex and dynamic market. David is a licensed Broker and the Broker of Record for Bosley – Toronto Realty Group

Find Out More About David Read More Posts

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6 Comments

  1. Francesca

    at 8:08 am

    It sounds like this was the best decision for this couple. I get the feeling they may have had buyers remorse had they bought it under such tight timelines. Impulsively buying a house can sometimes be wonderful but also terrible. It’s too bad that our real estate market is so crazy that people find themselves in this situation pretty often. Hopefully the right property will come around for them soon and they will have more time to mull it over and to revisit the property more than once to really ensure it’s the right one! Most people take more time buying furniture or a car than buying a property when buying a property is probably the most expensive thing you will buy plus if you make a mistake very costly to sell and move again. There should be a cooling off period to change your mind like they have for pre construction.

  2. R

    at 4:39 pm

    You didn’t lose if you didn’t play.

    Your clients “lost” this house only as much as the hundreds of other houses they didn’t see or didn’t offer on.

  3. Ace Goodheart

    at 6:33 pm

    The sellers allowed a single buyer to set their own offer night, set a floor price, and force any competing buyer to work on their time lines.

    The buyer hijacked the process.

    By allowing them to do so, the seller most certainly achieved a lower sale price, than they would have received, had they refused the bully outright and stuck to their pre scheduled offer night.

    This is why, as a seller, you should always outright refuse to entertain pre-emtive bids.

    1. Ace Goodheart

      at 9:51 am

      Really it depends where in Toronto you want to live.

      For example, it most certainly does not cost $3000.00 per month to rent an apartment in Dixon City.

      And there are still lots of places in the GTA where you can purchase a condo for under 300K (here are some examples):

      https://www.realtor.ca/real-estate/25323464/822-4645-jane-st-toronto-black-creek

      https://www.realtor.ca/real-estate/25413224/4645-jane-street-unit-912-toronto

      https://www.realtor.ca/real-estate/25465000/703-200-lotherton-ptwy-toronto-yorkdale-glen-park

      Rentals in these locations are cheap too.

      But no one wants to live there.

      For some reason, our main stream media, and its associated hanger on media outlets (Blogto?) seem to be focused on a specific message, even though that message is not accurate.

      It is like they write the story first, based on “woke” principles (“there is a housing crisis!”) and then they look around until they find facts that support their stories.

      In reality, the only housing crisis is the one that effects people who insist on living in over priced neighbourhoods.

      Go buy a condo up in Jane St North, if you are facing a crisis. Why does everyone have to live in Liberty Village?

Pick5 is a weekly series comparing and analyzing five residential properties based on price, style, location, and neighbourhood.

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